Good Clean Fun

K and I had so much fun last night. We did the stupidest thing: we played checkers over IM. LOL I know, so silly...but we laughed our asses off and it was just a great night. The funny thing is, I bought a webcam last night, so now he can see me too. I thought he was gonna be all perverse about it, but he wasn't. It was just a really nice night, and it made me so happy.

Sloth

This weekend was perhaps the laziest weekend I have had, without being sick, in about a year! I spent the majority of it watching the first season of Heroes, which I bought myself last week. My goal was to finish the whole season by tonight so that I can start watching the new season, which will include a new cast member: Kristen Bell (aka Veronica Mars)! I totally heart her, so I had to be loyal. And I have to say, I do like the series. There are a few casting choices I would not have made, but other than that it is pretty good. I still have 3.5 more episodes to watch from Season 1, so I should be caught up by next week. Then I will send the DVDs to my mommy, so she can catch up too.

K was out west this week....in Wyoming and Utah. He was so whiny! Complaining how bored he was, and how cold he was, and he had a headache from the elevation. Sheesh! Last night he was like "what if you needed me and I am all the way out here?" I was like "Okay, now u are just being lame." I mean, really....what if I needed him? What am I? Five? He just prefers to stay on the east coast. That's fine...but then he should just refuse to go out there. Honestly, he got under my skin this weekend really bad. Today he is giong to Washington and then hopefully he will head back east. Then maybe I will be able to stand him again.

Where do I begin??

Today was a particularly bizarre news day, in my humble opinion.

First, I saw a story about a guy at a gym, who picked up an exercise bike WITH A PERSON ON IT and through it at the wall. Apparently the "victim" was grunting too much during the spinning class, and this guy just couldn't take it anymore. Well, this guy is my new hero. There is nothing I hate more than men who grunt at the gym. I realize that sometimes you can't help it, but other times it is just for attention. Like some hot chick is gonna get all turned on by your manly noises? Not gonna happen my friend. It's disgusting. If you need to grunt THAT much during your work out, maybe you aren't in very good shape and you should take it down a notch. Otherwise, someone in better shape may just throw you through a wall. Rock on spin-rager dude. You can work out next to me anytime.

Next, I saw a story about a guy who lost his digital camera at an OSU football game. Apparently, some girl picked it up, downloaded the pics, and started an email chain letter looking for the dude in the pics. Eventually, enough buckeyes had forwarded the thing that the guy was found and got his camera back. Why was this on the national news? Because it's a human interest story of course! Imagine, all these wonderful, sensitive people getting together to make sure that this rich white man gets his cherished camera back! I always knew Americans had heart, but THIS! Just extraordinary. Imagine all the people that had to click "Forward" to make this miracle come true! It brings tears to my eyes. Really, I'm verclempt.

Finally, is the Jena 6. This is just some stupid little story about racism in Louisiana...no big deal. Just some black kids, thrown in jail, to be persecuted in a town that likes to hang nooses on trees. Hardly worth mentioning. Unless of course you remember the Scottsboro Boys, and maybe think you fell into a worm hole and woke up in the 1930s.

Yawn.

So, it's about 10:15 am and I already have nothing to do. I wrote two orders and that's all there is. Ugh. I still have this dreadful article to work on, but I hate it so I am ignoring it until my boss brings it up again. I have therapy at noon, so that will break up the day a bit...but I really just want to take a nap.

Yesterday I bought the 1st season of Heroes on DVD. I've never seen it before but I have decided to try and watch it this weekend so that I can watch the 2nd season. All the hype has made me curious. I hope I like it or that was a complete waste of 30 bucks! But I think I will like it cuz it sounds kinda like 4400 and I LOVE that show. So, we'll see.

In other news, K got a web cam, so he hooked it up last night so I could watch him drive. He was WAY too excited. He kept showing me the streets and stuff and he was like "Can u see me???" a thousand times. It was funny. I guess it will be nice to "see" him more now, but honestly watching him drive is like watching paint dry. But he is happy, so I played along. Now he wants me to get one so he can "see me eat cuz he doesn't believe that I eat when he is not around." Whatever the fuck that is about. Like my ass grows like this all by itself???

So, I guess I will just sit here and be bored all day. Hopefully I won't cause too much trouble. Hope u all are having a good Tuesday!

Envy? Nah.

So I watched the Emmy's last night and, as usual, my mom and I commented on all the dresses this morning. And I always think how wrong it is. I mean, all of these women are gorgeous - way better looking than I am. So who am I to talk? I could never look that good. Am I just making fun because I'm jealous? But then I think, no. These women are gorgeous and have all the money in the world - they should look perfect! If I had all that money, and all those people helping me, I certainly wouldn't leave the house wearing a swan, or a dress that was the same color as my skin, or anything else tragically heinous. I would at least wear a good color, and no feathers, and it would fit. So, I guess I do feel justified in commenting...especially considering the fabulous dresses I have picked out on my own very limited budget for my highly imperfect body, without any help from professionals.

Look What I Bought!!!!

It is a 32-inch LCD HDTV. I got it from Sears, brought it home & set it up all by myself! Yay! I love it! Although I am still recovering from signing the bill. LOL

How much do I HATE thee? Let me count the ways....

My father did the most heinous thing ever this week. He printed out emails from my sister and I, sent them to his lawyer and is trying to use them against my mother. I have to tell my sister today and I know it will break her heart. But she needs to know that she can't trust him. All night I was having nightmares about him. I kept trying to kill him or at least hurt him and nothing worked. Never in my life have I wished so much that he would die. Just when I think I can't hate him anymore, he tops it all. Here is the story.

My sister is coming to my house for thanksgiving. Under the divorce agreement, my father is supposed to pay her travel expenses up to $2500 each year. So, I told her that I would buy the tix and then see if he would pay me back. But if he refused, the tix will be her Xmas present. So, because she is afraid of him, she sent him an email that said that I offered to buy her tix as a Xmas gift. So, I send DB an email asking him if he wants me to buy them and send him the receipt or if he wants to just buy them. 24 hrs later, no answer. So I write him again and say that I will just buy them and send him the receipt so that she doesn't lose out on tix. I do that, email him the receipt. No response. Fine, whatever.

So yesterday my mom gets a letter in the mail from DB's lawyer, with copies of mine & my sister's emails attached. The letter says that he believes that my mom is coming down here for thanksgiving too and that this shows that she is manipulating the kids into working against him to take his money. WTF???? All he had to say was "No. These tix are not my responsibility. Jessi said they were an Xmas gift from you." End of story. But no, he has to be an asshole about it. So now my mother is afraid that her divorce is in jeopardy. Honestly, I don't think it can be. He already signed the agreement, this is just an interpretation issue. The contract says "travel to and from college." I think he wants it to say "travel to and from Buffalo." But it doesn't. He should have thought of that before. But I don't care, I'm not going to fight for $500. I will buy her anything she needs. It's not about the money, I just hate him for doing this. And there is like nothing I can do, ya know? I can't even call him and scream because for all I know he will fucking record it. All I can do is wait for him to die. I really think that will be the happiest day of my life.

Working Out The Kinks

When we moved into the new building the semi-private women's restroom nearest our chambers did not lock. It had a lock on it, but it was a purely decorative lock. So, we wrote "In Use!" on a pink post-it-note, and every time we went into the bathroom, we put the note on the outside of the door.

Last Friday, they put a new lock on the door. This one works, altho it doesn't feel very secure because it is hard to tell when you have locked the door unless you actually try the handle from the outside. But fine, better than a post-it note. Except that today someone locked us OUT of the bathroom. Nobody was in it, but the door was locked and there is no key. So, we got a maintenance guy to unlock it with a screwdriver.

Today's lessons: (1) You must purposely UNlock the bathroom door when you leave and (2) do not use the bathroom when there is anybody with a screwdriver in the vicinity.

Proof of Donut

I heard this bit on the radio today:

The other day I bought a donut and they gave me a receipt. I don't need a receipt for a donut! I give you money, you give me a donut. End of transaction. No need to get ink and paper involved.

I can't imagine a scenario where I would need to prove that I bought a donut. A skeptical friend perhaps? "Dude, don't even act like I didn't buy a donut. I have the documentation right here!"

I just have this to add: You know you're a lawyer when you hear this bit and start thinking "Well, what if you are accused of murder and you need an alibi for the exact time you bought the donut? Or what if the donut makes you sick and you decide to sue?"

So, yes, I am in the right profession. That's all.

Today's Top News Story:

News reel from six years ago! Amazing!! If they hadn't replayed all that stuff, after six whole years I surely would have forgot! Oh no wait, they played it last year, and the year before that, and....

I am all for remembering those who died, but can we not relive it every freakin' year? How is any family supposed to move on when every 365 days they have to watch the tragedy again? Imagine if you had to watch the death of a loved one over and over again every year. Your father's heart attack, you aunt's car accident, whatever it may be. We all know what happened. Mention it, tell us where the memorials are, and move the fuck on. Thank you.

Back To Square One

So, I had one full excellent day while we were in Buffalo, and then a few "better" days and now it's back to awful again. All I wanna do is cry, but for whatever reason the tears won't come. He says "don't be so emotional, it's no big deal." But it is a big deal. Why does he make me feel this way? He knows the things that upset me and he says them anyway. I feel sick with sadness right now. I know you are all thinking "what happened?" but it's WAY too TMI, even for this blog. I am just so sad, so hurt, I had to write something.

Also, I forgot to take a pill tonite. I wanted to start doing that on Sundays, cuz I have such a hard time falling asleep. But it's too late now. And I know it will be hard to sleep tonight now that I am upset. I wish I could brush things off the way he tells me too. But I just can't. Not these things.

Will Work For Food

So, as it has begun to appear that my attempts at a 2nd clerkship have failed, I am moving on to the 2nd phase of the job search: Law Firms. As much as it gives me a tummy ache to think about being a "real" lawyer, it's something I have to face. So, I have picked out 9 firms for the 1st round of applications. Five in NC and four in FL. I have sent an email to my former career services staff, asking for advice on the best way to go about this. My resume is already done, so all I really have to do is put together the packets, and I will send them out around October 1st.

My mother is officially having her own private breakdown. She is pretty convinced that I am going to let K ruin my life. I'm not sure what she thinks exactly, but something like me moving to Charlotte and taking care of K and his entire family and losing everything of my own. Nothing I say will convince her that I am not gonna let that happen. If only she knew how insensitive and cruel I really am, I doubt she would worry about this.

Personally, I am worried about moving to NC. Mostly because I don't know if I can be happy there, and once I'm there, I worry I won't be able to come back. I mean, once I leave, will any FL firm ever take me? I don't know. I am extra worried about moving after last weekend. This sounds dumb, but my allergies were SO bad in Buffalo, what if they are just as bad in NC? I haven't spent enough time up there to really know for sure. I was pretty bad in Atlanta, but I think after 3 years I built up more of a tolerance. But still, I remember being pretty miserable the 1st summer there. And I can't take my allergy meds during the day, cuz I get too sleepy.

Luckily, K is very supportive of me staying here if that is what I decide to do. It won't be easy, but it's not a deal-breaker. So, if I get a better job down here than up there, I will stay. But as it stands, the firms up there seem to be paying more. I feel like I need a forensic accountant to tell me, factoring in income tax and cost of living, how the salaries actually compare, ya know? Because it's more expensive to live here, but we have no state income tax. Also, even though houses are less expensive up there, groceries seem to be more expensive. I dunno. I guess I should try to get AN offer, before I worry about accepting or declining them! LOL

The Worst Revenge Is Proving Them Right

Just like any other workplace, mine has its own drama. One such drama includes a sort of feud between a friend of mine JS, and her co-worker B. It just so happens that B is friends with the secretary in my office, TW. So JS and B hate each, B bitches to TW, now TW hates JS and tells me that she doesn't trust her and "gets a bad vibe" from her. Last week TW and I had this conversation:

TW: Are you good friends with JS?
Me: Yeah, pretty good, why?
TW: Well, just do me a favor and don't mention my name to her.
Me: Ok.....why? Did something happen?
TW: No, I just don't get a good vibe from her, and I don't know how close you two are, but I don't want you telling her anything about me.
Me: Ok, well it's not something you need to worry about.

So, I thought this conversation was kinda weird and out of the blue, but whatever. Today I went to lunch with JS and she asked how TW and I were getting along, and I said "Well, I'm not allowed to talk to you about her actually. Haha." So, I tell JS the story. Well, JS flips the fuck out...but in this silent facial expression way that she does. She says "I am so mad right now. I really wanna go to TW and confront her about this." WTF? I was like "Please, dont do that. TW will just be mad at me and my life for the next year will be hell." But JS keeps saying she wants to talk to TW and how mad she is and blah blah blah.

I think JS totally overreacted, and pretty much proved TW right, ya know? I understand her being upset, but it was almost like she was gonna take it out on me. To be honest, I'm still not sure what JS is gonna do and it's making me nervous. And now I feel like I don't want to tell JS things anymore, about me or TW or anyone else, ya know? I know she's not a bad person, but the trust is kinda shaky right now. I dunno, just needed to vent about that.

And...She's Back!

Hello blog world. After 5 days in the dial-up world, I am back to high-speed. Thank goodness. I am also back in my real home, after a visit to my former home. I don't want to bore you all with minute details, so here are a few highlights:

1. I am SO allergic to that entire city. I sneezed every 5 minutes for 4 days.

2. I had wonderful girl time with Schmoe and Rita. The only way it could have been better is if it was longer!

3. K was only with me for 2 days of the vacation, but that went well. He got to see my mom, Rita, Hot Mike and my grandparents. He also took me on a tour of the ghetto so I could meet some of his "relatives" and such. It all went pretty well.

4. The 1st thing of substance my gramma said to me when I saw her was a lie. Nice.

5. K and I are doing much better. This was probably our best visit since last October. The vulgarity is pretty much gone, and the kisses are back. He was very sweet. We even slept in the same bed 2 full nights in a row! Go us.

6. I ate some good food, but not as much as I planned and it wasn't quite as good as I thought it would be.

7. I am so glad to be home.

Hope you all had a great long weekend! I'll write more soon.