Where do I begin??

Today was a particularly bizarre news day, in my humble opinion.

First, I saw a story about a guy at a gym, who picked up an exercise bike WITH A PERSON ON IT and through it at the wall. Apparently the "victim" was grunting too much during the spinning class, and this guy just couldn't take it anymore. Well, this guy is my new hero. There is nothing I hate more than men who grunt at the gym. I realize that sometimes you can't help it, but other times it is just for attention. Like some hot chick is gonna get all turned on by your manly noises? Not gonna happen my friend. It's disgusting. If you need to grunt THAT much during your work out, maybe you aren't in very good shape and you should take it down a notch. Otherwise, someone in better shape may just throw you through a wall. Rock on spin-rager dude. You can work out next to me anytime.

Next, I saw a story about a guy who lost his digital camera at an OSU football game. Apparently, some girl picked it up, downloaded the pics, and started an email chain letter looking for the dude in the pics. Eventually, enough buckeyes had forwarded the thing that the guy was found and got his camera back. Why was this on the national news? Because it's a human interest story of course! Imagine, all these wonderful, sensitive people getting together to make sure that this rich white man gets his cherished camera back! I always knew Americans had heart, but THIS! Just extraordinary. Imagine all the people that had to click "Forward" to make this miracle come true! It brings tears to my eyes. Really, I'm verclempt.

Finally, is the Jena 6. This is just some stupid little story about racism in Louisiana...no big deal. Just some black kids, thrown in jail, to be persecuted in a town that likes to hang nooses on trees. Hardly worth mentioning. Unless of course you remember the Scottsboro Boys, and maybe think you fell into a worm hole and woke up in the 1930s.