Out of the Loop

For some reason, I've always felt like I was just on the outside of everything. I always find out about everything after everyone else...I'm always playing catch up. Always the last to get a joke, the last to find out about the new hang out, ya know that kind of thing. In law school I was always definitely out of the loop. I mean, eventually I found out all the gossip (I think) and the inside info, but always later than everyone else. For example, I didn't start reading the major blogs until my 3rd year. Even then, I just happened upon them. And I still dont know who writes them or anything like that. I think the ones I've found are all from UT, not my school, cuzz I found them thru a friend who goes to UT and at least one has self-identified. I know that people at my school read these blogs long before I did. I also know that people at my school had their own blogs, but I never found any of them (except Tiffany's!). And now, of course, they are all shutting down, so I'm too late. And I feel like there is some huge inside joke that the law school classes of 2006 all across the country share, and I was left out of it. And just when I am trying to catch up - it's too late. I know this is all very high school and infantile, but I just feel left out, and kinda stupid. How did everyone else find out about these things and I didn't? It's not like I went thru 3 yrs of law school without a friend in the world, but still, I missed something. Did people just find these things through sheer Google effort? Or was there some mass forwarding scheme that I was left out of? And what is it about me that perpetuates this kind of chronic come-lately-ness? The strange thing is that, for most of my life, I've been the center of my group of friends. I'm usually the glue that hold things together. The one that makes sure we keep meeting up and planning things, and when I was younger it was unheard of that my groups would hang out without me. If I was out of town or sick or grounded, nobody did anything. They'd all just wait because nobody felt comfortable enough with anyone else to initiate anything, ya know? Like when Elaine & George tried to hang out without Jerry on Seinfeld. But the older I get, the less central I am, and the more I feel left out of things. The more I'm in the dark. So, I guess the point of this post is, all those law school blogs are ending, and I missed it, and I am sad about that. It's a stupid thing to be sad about...but, ya know, it's the truth. So, I'm pathetic....is anyone surprised??