So, last night I was having an episode of what I call "sexual depression." The major symptom of such an episode is chronic internet searching for some kind of answer. Yesterday, I found two new terms "sexual anorexia" and "sexual aversion." I googled "sexual aversion" and found the most appropriate and helpful article I have found so far. The entire thing is very long, so I K wouldn't read it. This article does do a little more "husband blaming" than I would do (like, I would never characterize K as abusive), but the description and the woman's story are very relevant to me. So, I cut out about 1000 words of the article and sent them to K. Here is that excerpt:
You probably began your marriage not knowing how to enjoy sex, and made love to your husband out of a spirit of generosity. You may not have known how to become sexually aroused or how to climax. But as long as you were in the state of intimacy, the experience was somewhat pleasant for you, because the sex act made you feel more emotionally connected to him.
Eventually your husband did something that made you feel less than generous. He hurt your feelings. It may have been something he said to you that was angry or judgmental. But you made love to him anyway, out of obligation. That experience was downright unpleasant, because you had absolutely no interest in being emotionally connected to him at the time. You probably wanted him to get it over as quickly as possible. Your husband may have had no way of knowing that you were suffering, because you didn't want to confront your husband with your resentment.
From that point on, your sexual experiences became predictably unpleasant. You made love because he expected it, not because you were willing, and you did whatever you could to avoid it or to make it brief. Whenever he would reach over an touch you at night, you knew that the nightmare was about to begin again. You eventually hated his touch. You may have told him how much it bothered you, but he would do it anyway. There was no way to stop him. Eventually, you developed an aversion to sex.
Had you started your marriage with an agreement that you would only make love to your husband when, and in a way that, you would enjoy it and respond sexually, you would never have had an aversion. Your sexual interest would have increased over the years.
You are wired physiologically to enjoy sex. If you had made love to your husband on your terms and for your pleasure, it would only have been a matter of time before all the connections would have been discovered. Then, you may have come to need sex more than he does.
But because you did not understand how important your emotional reaction was, you not only didn't try to enjoy the experience sexually, but you also put yourself though emotional pain in your effort to meet your husband's need for sex. Your effort to meet his need unconditionally did you in, and now you're not meeting it at all.
Sexual aversion is usually poorly understood by those who have it. These people commonly report that engaging in sex is unpleasant, something they want to avoid. They may find that sexual arousal, and even a climax is also unpleasant. There isn't anything they like about it, and some actually experience a panic attack in the sex act itself. When they're asked to explain why they feel the way they do, few have a clear understanding of their reaction. They often blame themselves.
Their ignorance comes from a poor understanding of where their feelings come from. People often have the mistaken belief that they can decide to feel any way they want. They can decide to feel depressed or they can decide to feel cheerful. But those who suffer from chronic depression usually know it's not that simple. And when people have a sexual aversion, they cannot simply decide to feel good about sex.
Emotional reactions are not based on our decisions and an emotional aversion is no exception. An aversion is an unconscious, physiological association of a particular behavior with an extremely unpleasant emotional experience. Those who have that association have no control over the aversive reaction that is inevitable.
So when a person has had repeatedly unpleasant experiences making love, and the association of those experiences with sexual behavior has led to an aversion, they experience emotional pain whenever lovemaking is anticipated or attempted.
As in your case, sexual aversion is a disaster of major proportions for couples. Sex is a need that should be met in marriage, but if a spouse has an aversion to meeting it, it becomes almost impossible as long as the aversion exists.
To avoid aversions in the first place, keep unpleasant experiences to a minimum. That's why I am so adamant about couples learning to follow the Policy of Joint Agreement (never do anything without an enthusiastic agreement between you and your spouse). If they apply the policy to their sexual relationships, making love would never be unpleasant for either partner. Not only does it help them create a lifestyle of compatibility, but it also eliminates the possibility of any aversion to meeting each other's needs.
Overcoming Aversion to Sex
The symptoms of aversion to sex are fear of engaging in sex, trying to make the sex act as short as possible, finding that you need to build up your confidence and resolve before sex just to get through it, thinking of excuses to avoid or postpone sex, and feeling ill just prior to sex and somewhat depressed afterward. Some people actually experience panic attacks while engaged in sex. Your symptom of revulsion at the very thought of having sex is also a typical symptom.
Any of the symptoms of sexual aversion will interfere with your ability to meet your husband's need. How can you meet his need for sex if you have even one of these reactions? You can't. You must completely overcome the aversion if you ever hope to enjoy a sexual experience with your husband. And then be certain that the conditions that led to your aversion are never repeated.
Remember how you developed the aversion in the first place? You associated a certain behavior, having sex, with an unpleasant emotional reaction to something your husband did to you. Eventually the unpleasant reaction was triggered whenever you even thought about having sex with your husband, and certainly whenever you made love.
To overcome the aversion, you must break the association of sex with your husband from the unpleasant emotional reaction. The easiest way to do that is to associate sex with the state of relaxation.
Those without a sexual aversion may suggest that you take the direct route: Try to relax next time you make love. However, you and anyone else experiencing this hardship knows that the direct route is usually impossible to follow. The very thought of having sex with your husband probably puts you in a state of near-panic.
Link to full article: www.marriagebuilders.com/graphic/mbi5047_qa.html
After this, it goes on to describe a plan for healing. I am going to try to follow it. Maybe it will reduce the instances of sexual depression I have. The only thing that worries me is that, as far as K and I are concerned, I feel like it's too late for me to like sex. He says he hasn't given up on me, but his actions and other things he says make it hard for me to believe that. And I don't know if we can go backwards. So, I don't want to learn to like sex and then be rejected. But maybe at least I can follow some of the advice in this article, and everything can be less traumatizing. Maybe I wont have to try so hard to forget the sex we have, and I won't dread future sex as much. It will mean that I need 15 minutes of quiet time a day, to do some relaxation exercises. It may be hard to find that time, but I am going to try. We'll see what happens.
Monday, April 30, 2007
Sunday, April 29, 2007
Inside vs. Outside
Lately there has been a lot in the media about transgender people. Friday night 20/20 did a special on transgender kids; this morning on CBS they interviewed Renee Richards, a transgender tennis player; All My Children had a transgender character; and apparently a sports writer in LA has announced that he is becoming a woman. Anyone who really wants to know about the transgender experience should watch the documentary "Southern Comfort" - it is the best, and most heartbreaking, documentary I have ever seen. I own it, so if you know me I can lend it to you!
This may seem strange to some of you, but I have been asked by several people, on several ocassions in my life, if I ever thought I was transgender. People think that because I hate sex, I must hate my gender. But why on earth would anyone think I would want a penis? YUCK! I definitely do not. I can't imagine that. Certainly, I am not crazy about my girl parts...but I never wanted boy parts. I'd like to have my uterus removed so I don't have to worry about getting pregnant. I sometimes wish I could have my vagina sewn up so I can't be raped - but I could still be raped anally which could be worse, so I guess I'll keep the vagina. Most people who know me well have heard my favorite quote: "My cunt is built like a wound that won't heal." The first time I heard those words, on an Ani Difranco album, I was like "YES! That is exactly how I feel!" I've always hated that part of me, it has caused me nothing but problems, and it continues to.
I feel almost certain that it will kill me one day. That I will die from some form of female cancer or something related to that area of me. I feel like I've always been at war with my cunt. One of the parents on 20/20 said she saw her son in the shower once washing his hair and holding a washcloth over his penis because he hated it so much he didn't want to look at it. I've never felt like that. I look in the mirror and I am not offended by my body. But I still hate having a cunt. I hate the vulnerability, I hate the problems, I hate the responsibility. But no, I don't want to be a boy.
I think that there are all kinds of sexuality and gender identity. I don't know where I fall on the sexuality continuum. Probably at the very end of straight, on the cusp of gay. But I've always been fully on the female end of the gender identity continuum. I've always liked being a girl, wearing dresses, coloring my hair, dancing. I even played with dolls as a kid. So, I know that transgender kids are that way because of some kind of biological imbalance - because I know for sure that you can hate your parts, but still identify with your gender. These kids do not identify with their gender AND they hate their parts - because of that. I feel horrible for them, because of the difficulties they will face in being accepted and understood. And, even though I am not transgender, I kind of identify with them. I feel like I am of an alternative sexuality, because people don't understand me either. They are looking for an explanation all the time. It's so sad that society puts such a premium on sexuality and gender. That anything but plain old straight and comfortable with your gender is strange. As much as I hate the problems I have with my sexuality, I am at least grateful that my mental and emotional gender matches my body. So that only people who get to know me well ever know that I am unusual. At least I don't have to wear my abnormality on my sleeve, so to speak, even though I sometimes choose to.
This may seem strange to some of you, but I have been asked by several people, on several ocassions in my life, if I ever thought I was transgender. People think that because I hate sex, I must hate my gender. But why on earth would anyone think I would want a penis? YUCK! I definitely do not. I can't imagine that. Certainly, I am not crazy about my girl parts...but I never wanted boy parts. I'd like to have my uterus removed so I don't have to worry about getting pregnant. I sometimes wish I could have my vagina sewn up so I can't be raped - but I could still be raped anally which could be worse, so I guess I'll keep the vagina. Most people who know me well have heard my favorite quote: "My cunt is built like a wound that won't heal." The first time I heard those words, on an Ani Difranco album, I was like "YES! That is exactly how I feel!" I've always hated that part of me, it has caused me nothing but problems, and it continues to.
I feel almost certain that it will kill me one day. That I will die from some form of female cancer or something related to that area of me. I feel like I've always been at war with my cunt. One of the parents on 20/20 said she saw her son in the shower once washing his hair and holding a washcloth over his penis because he hated it so much he didn't want to look at it. I've never felt like that. I look in the mirror and I am not offended by my body. But I still hate having a cunt. I hate the vulnerability, I hate the problems, I hate the responsibility. But no, I don't want to be a boy.
I think that there are all kinds of sexuality and gender identity. I don't know where I fall on the sexuality continuum. Probably at the very end of straight, on the cusp of gay. But I've always been fully on the female end of the gender identity continuum. I've always liked being a girl, wearing dresses, coloring my hair, dancing. I even played with dolls as a kid. So, I know that transgender kids are that way because of some kind of biological imbalance - because I know for sure that you can hate your parts, but still identify with your gender. These kids do not identify with their gender AND they hate their parts - because of that. I feel horrible for them, because of the difficulties they will face in being accepted and understood. And, even though I am not transgender, I kind of identify with them. I feel like I am of an alternative sexuality, because people don't understand me either. They are looking for an explanation all the time. It's so sad that society puts such a premium on sexuality and gender. That anything but plain old straight and comfortable with your gender is strange. As much as I hate the problems I have with my sexuality, I am at least grateful that my mental and emotional gender matches my body. So that only people who get to know me well ever know that I am unusual. At least I don't have to wear my abnormality on my sleeve, so to speak, even though I sometimes choose to.
Monday, April 23, 2007
One Down, 30 or 40 To Go!
Today is my one year anniversary with K! How awesome are we? Yeah, I thought so.
It hasn't been the easiest year of my life, but I have enjoyed having him around. This year was tough for a lot of reasons - moving, taking the bar, starting a new job - and I think he may have made those things easier. So, I guess we'll keep going.
I hope y'all are okay with that! If not, please start voicing your objections now before I get in too much trouble! Thnx.
It hasn't been the easiest year of my life, but I have enjoyed having him around. This year was tough for a lot of reasons - moving, taking the bar, starting a new job - and I think he may have made those things easier. So, I guess we'll keep going.
I hope y'all are okay with that! If not, please start voicing your objections now before I get in too much trouble! Thnx.
Thursday, April 19, 2007
Ready! Aim! Shoot! (Guns and Video Recorders)
Okay, boys and girls - so what have we learned this week? Well, first of all, if this Cho guy had lost his mind a week earlier, Don Imus would still have a job. Okay, stop booing and hissing at me, I know it sounds cold, but it's true. Because this VT thing has really taken over the airwaves.
Of course, I think it's awful. I feel terrible for that school, and those kids and their families. I feel terrible for Cho's family. It's a horrible tragedy. But do we really need the media to interview 1,000 different people just so we can see them all cry? I think it's a bit ridiculous. I hate how reporters ask people things like "How did it feel to watch your friend bleed to death and not be able to help her?" or "Have you broken down yet? Have you cried?" (Often asked of people who are crying at the time). It is just insane. It's not news, it's not entertainment, and it serves no greater good. These people are all very upset, scared, guilt-ridden and angry. Each person involved will feel a combination of those emotions in different amounts and different intervals for a long time. I don't need to hear them describe it over and over again. It makes it worse for them, and if this nation is desparate to feed off the misery of others, then let them go volunteer at a hospice or join the military. But can you imagine not even being able to turn on the TV without seeing something about your child's death on the news? They deserve to grieve in private now. Turn the cameras off.
One final note, nothing disgusted me more than the picture of cops/EMTs carrying a bloody body out of a building by its limbs. I couldn't tell if the person was alive or dead. I now know he was, and is, alive. Why did they carry him like that? Why wasn't he on a stretcher? Why couldn't they put their arms under his body and carry him like a board, rather than by his wrists and ankles? I can't imagine his parents seeing that picture. What if they didn't know how he was yet when they saw it? What if his mother recognized his clothing and thought her son's dead body was being carried out like a deer carcass? The woman could have had a nervous breakdown. We never needed to see that picture. I felt the same way about the buckets of body parts at the WTC on 9/11. What if someone recognized a wrist watch as they saw an arm going into that bucket? Some things are news, some are entertainment, others are just superfluous gore. I am all for free press and no censorship, but I am also for dignity and common sense. I think the media may need a refresher course in those things.
Of course, I think it's awful. I feel terrible for that school, and those kids and their families. I feel terrible for Cho's family. It's a horrible tragedy. But do we really need the media to interview 1,000 different people just so we can see them all cry? I think it's a bit ridiculous. I hate how reporters ask people things like "How did it feel to watch your friend bleed to death and not be able to help her?" or "Have you broken down yet? Have you cried?" (Often asked of people who are crying at the time). It is just insane. It's not news, it's not entertainment, and it serves no greater good. These people are all very upset, scared, guilt-ridden and angry. Each person involved will feel a combination of those emotions in different amounts and different intervals for a long time. I don't need to hear them describe it over and over again. It makes it worse for them, and if this nation is desparate to feed off the misery of others, then let them go volunteer at a hospice or join the military. But can you imagine not even being able to turn on the TV without seeing something about your child's death on the news? They deserve to grieve in private now. Turn the cameras off.
One final note, nothing disgusted me more than the picture of cops/EMTs carrying a bloody body out of a building by its limbs. I couldn't tell if the person was alive or dead. I now know he was, and is, alive. Why did they carry him like that? Why wasn't he on a stretcher? Why couldn't they put their arms under his body and carry him like a board, rather than by his wrists and ankles? I can't imagine his parents seeing that picture. What if they didn't know how he was yet when they saw it? What if his mother recognized his clothing and thought her son's dead body was being carried out like a deer carcass? The woman could have had a nervous breakdown. We never needed to see that picture. I felt the same way about the buckets of body parts at the WTC on 9/11. What if someone recognized a wrist watch as they saw an arm going into that bucket? Some things are news, some are entertainment, others are just superfluous gore. I am all for free press and no censorship, but I am also for dignity and common sense. I think the media may need a refresher course in those things.
Monday, April 16, 2007
I Actually Left The House
So, I went to a party this weekend. And yes, I did stay out past 10pm. And yes, that did give my mother a heart attack. And yes, I know I am 27 years old.
Anyhoo....so the party was a good time. Lots of great people, lots of laughing, and lots of good food. But I did make one strange observation. There were a lot of hetero couples at this party. And I noticed that in several of those couples it seems that the guy is way more into the relationship than the girl. Well, maybe "way more" is a bit strong, but still. I thought this was strange, because I would expect the reverse of that. Maybe we need a book called "She's just not that into you." Hm? Altho, I guess its not a lack of the girl being "into" the guy...just a lack of being "into" the relationships. Like, they just aren't all that interested in being girlfriends. I know that feeling quite well. I wonder if its because, at this particular party, all of the girls were "career gals" - who have put a lot of effort into learning how to take care of themselves. I think that when women do that, it pushes them away from lives that involve relationships. While men expect to have wives and families no matter how much they dedicate to their career. Men simply don't feel like its a choice the way women do. And, in that same vein, women feel like becoming a girlfriend or wife is a liability, like it makes them weaker or means they have to give things up. I admit that, even tho K is very supportive and encouraging, and always says he doesn't want me to give up any career opportunities, I do worry about that. I still feel like this relationship weakens me somehow. But seeing these guys, who are great guys, in these unequal relationships, made me sad. I don't want girls doing that to my friends. And I don't want to be doing that to K. But I guess it's just a sign of the times, and I guess that maybe the guys understand that too, and are willing to deal with that in exchange for having a woman with half a brain. I dunno, just some thoughts.
Anyhoo....so the party was a good time. Lots of great people, lots of laughing, and lots of good food. But I did make one strange observation. There were a lot of hetero couples at this party. And I noticed that in several of those couples it seems that the guy is way more into the relationship than the girl. Well, maybe "way more" is a bit strong, but still. I thought this was strange, because I would expect the reverse of that. Maybe we need a book called "She's just not that into you." Hm? Altho, I guess its not a lack of the girl being "into" the guy...just a lack of being "into" the relationships. Like, they just aren't all that interested in being girlfriends. I know that feeling quite well. I wonder if its because, at this particular party, all of the girls were "career gals" - who have put a lot of effort into learning how to take care of themselves. I think that when women do that, it pushes them away from lives that involve relationships. While men expect to have wives and families no matter how much they dedicate to their career. Men simply don't feel like its a choice the way women do. And, in that same vein, women feel like becoming a girlfriend or wife is a liability, like it makes them weaker or means they have to give things up. I admit that, even tho K is very supportive and encouraging, and always says he doesn't want me to give up any career opportunities, I do worry about that. I still feel like this relationship weakens me somehow. But seeing these guys, who are great guys, in these unequal relationships, made me sad. I don't want girls doing that to my friends. And I don't want to be doing that to K. But I guess it's just a sign of the times, and I guess that maybe the guys understand that too, and are willing to deal with that in exchange for having a woman with half a brain. I dunno, just some thoughts.
Thursday, April 12, 2007
All Done
Well, it's over. Imus has been fired from CBS. Good job Sharpton...just goes to show that if you put your mind to something ridiculous, you can accomplish it. I know that I, for one, will sleep better tonight.
Maybe we should start a new Betty Ford-type clinic for racists. Our poster boys could be Michael Richards, Mel Gibson, "the guy from Scrubs" and Don Imus. That would be one unattractive poster, but it may serve the black community well by making them grateful they aren't those guys. Plus, Sharpton could use it as a dart board. I wonder who will step up next to give him a target.
Maybe we should start a new Betty Ford-type clinic for racists. Our poster boys could be Michael Richards, Mel Gibson, "the guy from Scrubs" and Don Imus. That would be one unattractive poster, but it may serve the black community well by making them grateful they aren't those guys. Plus, Sharpton could use it as a dart board. I wonder who will step up next to give him a target.
*Sighs*
Well, MSNBC has officially given Imus the boot. That's good considering how hideously ugly he is. So now, Sharpton has organized a "March on CBS" to get him off the radio too. Good job Sharpton. Clearly, Imus on the radio is the most important issue facing the black community today. You get right on that! Rid our radio waves of this evil so finally the country can be at peace and enjoy racial harmony! Um, yeah, sure, whatev.
Meanwhile, back at the ranch....I have NOTHING to do at work. When I say "nothing" I mean it. No ripe motions until April 23rd, which actually means the 24th because the responses won't be filed until the very last minute on the 23rd. I have even done all of my co-clerk's work that I can possibly do. He has a bench trial coming up on Monday, so I am trying to hide under my desk so I don't get stuck with that...so far, so good. But I am hideously bored. Yesterday I left 2 hours early, after taking a 90 minute lunch break, because I had simply worn out myspace and facebook to the point that they offered no more entertainment. It really is too bad I don't enjoy porn, that would give me something to do. Maybe I will start bringing in DVDs and watching movies all day. I dunno. For today, I brought a book, so that should do for a while. Maybe I will get to leave early again. I am hoping my boss will at least give me tomorrow off, since he is going to be off too. I feel bad that I am leaving all the time, but he could give me something to do if he wanted to...there just isn't anything to give me. Maybe at my next job I should work slower....I will try! Of course, I am sure that this job will get busy again eventually, but not until at least next month.
Oh, and BTW, for those of you that were wondering, I got my test results back and things seem fine for now. Altho, I have been sentenced to have a pap every 3 months. That is completely uncalled for.
So...I guess that's all for now!
Meanwhile, back at the ranch....I have NOTHING to do at work. When I say "nothing" I mean it. No ripe motions until April 23rd, which actually means the 24th because the responses won't be filed until the very last minute on the 23rd. I have even done all of my co-clerk's work that I can possibly do. He has a bench trial coming up on Monday, so I am trying to hide under my desk so I don't get stuck with that...so far, so good. But I am hideously bored. Yesterday I left 2 hours early, after taking a 90 minute lunch break, because I had simply worn out myspace and facebook to the point that they offered no more entertainment. It really is too bad I don't enjoy porn, that would give me something to do. Maybe I will start bringing in DVDs and watching movies all day. I dunno. For today, I brought a book, so that should do for a while. Maybe I will get to leave early again. I am hoping my boss will at least give me tomorrow off, since he is going to be off too. I feel bad that I am leaving all the time, but he could give me something to do if he wanted to...there just isn't anything to give me. Maybe at my next job I should work slower....I will try! Of course, I am sure that this job will get busy again eventually, but not until at least next month.
Oh, and BTW, for those of you that were wondering, I got my test results back and things seem fine for now. Altho, I have been sentenced to have a pap every 3 months. That is completely uncalled for.
So...I guess that's all for now!
Tuesday, April 10, 2007
Bitches Ain't Shit But Hos & Tricks
Ah, Don Imus. Gotta love that man. I'm sure you are all up on this story, so I won't reiterate, just comment.
This morning I turned on my TV, and thought I was watching the Today show, but I was actually watching Imus' show, which was showing his interview with Matt Lauer and Rev. Al Sharpton on the Today show. Just when you thought he couldn't fit his large disgusting foot any further down his own throat, Imus does it again. He starts out apologizing for his comment. Then, he blames it on black men, saying that they invented the term he used, and use it towards black women all the time, so people should take that into consideration. Imus reminds us all what a good guy he is, and that he has a fantastic relatinship with the black community, after all he did go on Sharpton's show to apologize for his comments. Then he calls Sharpton a coward for not coming on the Imus show to debate the issue with him.
First of all, I think Sharpton is a lunatic and a moron just like most people. He is constantly fighting the wrong battles with the vigor of a small overly-fuzzy dog running head first into a sliding glass door. (Even if you thought there was another dog running toward you, wouldn't you swerve to avoid it? I digress...) However, Imus, don't feed the fire. Puh-lease! Sharpton would look like a fool coming on your show after telling everyone you should be fired. And why should he have to? He has nothing to defend to you. And debate what exactly? Whether the women of Rutgers really are nappy-headed hos? Or whether black men made you think they were? I don't think there is a debate here. You made a ridiculous, offensive, dumb ass statement in front of the world. Sit down, shut up and think about what you've done. Also, get a haircut & some plastic surgery. Remember the saying "you have a perfect face for radio?" They were talking about you - unfortunately your radio face has invaded my TV (and now my YouTube).
Second, we have heard that Imus has been suspended for 2 weeks. Apparently he gets to pick his 2 weeks? First he had to come back on his show to insult more people and cause more problems. While commenting on his Today show interview, Imus defended himself, insulted Sharpton again, and insulted Matt Lauer. I think he may have even called for Lauer to be fired (I second that, by the way, but for very different reasons). I mean, seriously he just doesn't know when to shut up. He even tried to differentiate himself from Michael Richards, Mel Gibson, and "that guy from Scrubs" by saying that he is not a racist, he is a good man and a comedian. Alllllllrighty then.
Honestly, this whole thing is doing Imus a favor. All of a sudden he is back in the public eye and a whole new generation of people can be disgusted by what they see. Next step: he goes to Rutgers to apologize to the nappy-headed hos. Maybe he will autograph some of their tatoos. Or maybe they will kick his ass. Either way, it will get Imus more press, make Sharpton more angry, and accomplish absolutely nothing. Altho, Imus has suggested that after his suspension he may try to have one "black person" on the show each week. That way he can blame all of his comments on that guy, and when someone calls him a racist he can hold up a picture of the two of them together and say "Nuh uh, I totally have black friends! See? Look at me and this nappy headed nigga in this picture right here!"
Rock on.
This morning I turned on my TV, and thought I was watching the Today show, but I was actually watching Imus' show, which was showing his interview with Matt Lauer and Rev. Al Sharpton on the Today show. Just when you thought he couldn't fit his large disgusting foot any further down his own throat, Imus does it again. He starts out apologizing for his comment. Then, he blames it on black men, saying that they invented the term he used, and use it towards black women all the time, so people should take that into consideration. Imus reminds us all what a good guy he is, and that he has a fantastic relatinship with the black community, after all he did go on Sharpton's show to apologize for his comments. Then he calls Sharpton a coward for not coming on the Imus show to debate the issue with him.
First of all, I think Sharpton is a lunatic and a moron just like most people. He is constantly fighting the wrong battles with the vigor of a small overly-fuzzy dog running head first into a sliding glass door. (Even if you thought there was another dog running toward you, wouldn't you swerve to avoid it? I digress...) However, Imus, don't feed the fire. Puh-lease! Sharpton would look like a fool coming on your show after telling everyone you should be fired. And why should he have to? He has nothing to defend to you. And debate what exactly? Whether the women of Rutgers really are nappy-headed hos? Or whether black men made you think they were? I don't think there is a debate here. You made a ridiculous, offensive, dumb ass statement in front of the world. Sit down, shut up and think about what you've done. Also, get a haircut & some plastic surgery. Remember the saying "you have a perfect face for radio?" They were talking about you - unfortunately your radio face has invaded my TV (and now my YouTube).
Second, we have heard that Imus has been suspended for 2 weeks. Apparently he gets to pick his 2 weeks? First he had to come back on his show to insult more people and cause more problems. While commenting on his Today show interview, Imus defended himself, insulted Sharpton again, and insulted Matt Lauer. I think he may have even called for Lauer to be fired (I second that, by the way, but for very different reasons). I mean, seriously he just doesn't know when to shut up. He even tried to differentiate himself from Michael Richards, Mel Gibson, and "that guy from Scrubs" by saying that he is not a racist, he is a good man and a comedian. Alllllllrighty then.
Honestly, this whole thing is doing Imus a favor. All of a sudden he is back in the public eye and a whole new generation of people can be disgusted by what they see. Next step: he goes to Rutgers to apologize to the nappy-headed hos. Maybe he will autograph some of their tatoos. Or maybe they will kick his ass. Either way, it will get Imus more press, make Sharpton more angry, and accomplish absolutely nothing. Altho, Imus has suggested that after his suspension he may try to have one "black person" on the show each week. That way he can blame all of his comments on that guy, and when someone calls him a racist he can hold up a picture of the two of them together and say "Nuh uh, I totally have black friends! See? Look at me and this nappy headed nigga in this picture right here!"
Rock on.
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