Working Out The Kinks

When we moved into the new building the semi-private women's restroom nearest our chambers did not lock. It had a lock on it, but it was a purely decorative lock. So, we wrote "In Use!" on a pink post-it-note, and every time we went into the bathroom, we put the note on the outside of the door.

Last Friday, they put a new lock on the door. This one works, altho it doesn't feel very secure because it is hard to tell when you have locked the door unless you actually try the handle from the outside. But fine, better than a post-it note. Except that today someone locked us OUT of the bathroom. Nobody was in it, but the door was locked and there is no key. So, we got a maintenance guy to unlock it with a screwdriver.

Today's lessons: (1) You must purposely UNlock the bathroom door when you leave and (2) do not use the bathroom when there is anybody with a screwdriver in the vicinity.

Proof of Donut

I heard this bit on the radio today:

The other day I bought a donut and they gave me a receipt. I don't need a receipt for a donut! I give you money, you give me a donut. End of transaction. No need to get ink and paper involved.

I can't imagine a scenario where I would need to prove that I bought a donut. A skeptical friend perhaps? "Dude, don't even act like I didn't buy a donut. I have the documentation right here!"

I just have this to add: You know you're a lawyer when you hear this bit and start thinking "Well, what if you are accused of murder and you need an alibi for the exact time you bought the donut? Or what if the donut makes you sick and you decide to sue?"

So, yes, I am in the right profession. That's all.

Today's Top News Story:

News reel from six years ago! Amazing!! If they hadn't replayed all that stuff, after six whole years I surely would have forgot! Oh no wait, they played it last year, and the year before that, and....

I am all for remembering those who died, but can we not relive it every freakin' year? How is any family supposed to move on when every 365 days they have to watch the tragedy again? Imagine if you had to watch the death of a loved one over and over again every year. Your father's heart attack, you aunt's car accident, whatever it may be. We all know what happened. Mention it, tell us where the memorials are, and move the fuck on. Thank you.

Back To Square One

So, I had one full excellent day while we were in Buffalo, and then a few "better" days and now it's back to awful again. All I wanna do is cry, but for whatever reason the tears won't come. He says "don't be so emotional, it's no big deal." But it is a big deal. Why does he make me feel this way? He knows the things that upset me and he says them anyway. I feel sick with sadness right now. I know you are all thinking "what happened?" but it's WAY too TMI, even for this blog. I am just so sad, so hurt, I had to write something.

Also, I forgot to take a pill tonite. I wanted to start doing that on Sundays, cuz I have such a hard time falling asleep. But it's too late now. And I know it will be hard to sleep tonight now that I am upset. I wish I could brush things off the way he tells me too. But I just can't. Not these things.

Will Work For Food

So, as it has begun to appear that my attempts at a 2nd clerkship have failed, I am moving on to the 2nd phase of the job search: Law Firms. As much as it gives me a tummy ache to think about being a "real" lawyer, it's something I have to face. So, I have picked out 9 firms for the 1st round of applications. Five in NC and four in FL. I have sent an email to my former career services staff, asking for advice on the best way to go about this. My resume is already done, so all I really have to do is put together the packets, and I will send them out around October 1st.

My mother is officially having her own private breakdown. She is pretty convinced that I am going to let K ruin my life. I'm not sure what she thinks exactly, but something like me moving to Charlotte and taking care of K and his entire family and losing everything of my own. Nothing I say will convince her that I am not gonna let that happen. If only she knew how insensitive and cruel I really am, I doubt she would worry about this.

Personally, I am worried about moving to NC. Mostly because I don't know if I can be happy there, and once I'm there, I worry I won't be able to come back. I mean, once I leave, will any FL firm ever take me? I don't know. I am extra worried about moving after last weekend. This sounds dumb, but my allergies were SO bad in Buffalo, what if they are just as bad in NC? I haven't spent enough time up there to really know for sure. I was pretty bad in Atlanta, but I think after 3 years I built up more of a tolerance. But still, I remember being pretty miserable the 1st summer there. And I can't take my allergy meds during the day, cuz I get too sleepy.

Luckily, K is very supportive of me staying here if that is what I decide to do. It won't be easy, but it's not a deal-breaker. So, if I get a better job down here than up there, I will stay. But as it stands, the firms up there seem to be paying more. I feel like I need a forensic accountant to tell me, factoring in income tax and cost of living, how the salaries actually compare, ya know? Because it's more expensive to live here, but we have no state income tax. Also, even though houses are less expensive up there, groceries seem to be more expensive. I dunno. I guess I should try to get AN offer, before I worry about accepting or declining them! LOL

The Worst Revenge Is Proving Them Right

Just like any other workplace, mine has its own drama. One such drama includes a sort of feud between a friend of mine JS, and her co-worker B. It just so happens that B is friends with the secretary in my office, TW. So JS and B hate each, B bitches to TW, now TW hates JS and tells me that she doesn't trust her and "gets a bad vibe" from her. Last week TW and I had this conversation:

TW: Are you good friends with JS?
Me: Yeah, pretty good, why?
TW: Well, just do me a favor and don't mention my name to her.
Me: Ok.....why? Did something happen?
TW: No, I just don't get a good vibe from her, and I don't know how close you two are, but I don't want you telling her anything about me.
Me: Ok, well it's not something you need to worry about.

So, I thought this conversation was kinda weird and out of the blue, but whatever. Today I went to lunch with JS and she asked how TW and I were getting along, and I said "Well, I'm not allowed to talk to you about her actually. Haha." So, I tell JS the story. Well, JS flips the fuck out...but in this silent facial expression way that she does. She says "I am so mad right now. I really wanna go to TW and confront her about this." WTF? I was like "Please, dont do that. TW will just be mad at me and my life for the next year will be hell." But JS keeps saying she wants to talk to TW and how mad she is and blah blah blah.

I think JS totally overreacted, and pretty much proved TW right, ya know? I understand her being upset, but it was almost like she was gonna take it out on me. To be honest, I'm still not sure what JS is gonna do and it's making me nervous. And now I feel like I don't want to tell JS things anymore, about me or TW or anyone else, ya know? I know she's not a bad person, but the trust is kinda shaky right now. I dunno, just needed to vent about that.

And...She's Back!

Hello blog world. After 5 days in the dial-up world, I am back to high-speed. Thank goodness. I am also back in my real home, after a visit to my former home. I don't want to bore you all with minute details, so here are a few highlights:

1. I am SO allergic to that entire city. I sneezed every 5 minutes for 4 days.

2. I had wonderful girl time with Schmoe and Rita. The only way it could have been better is if it was longer!

3. K was only with me for 2 days of the vacation, but that went well. He got to see my mom, Rita, Hot Mike and my grandparents. He also took me on a tour of the ghetto so I could meet some of his "relatives" and such. It all went pretty well.

4. The 1st thing of substance my gramma said to me when I saw her was a lie. Nice.

5. K and I are doing much better. This was probably our best visit since last October. The vulgarity is pretty much gone, and the kisses are back. He was very sweet. We even slept in the same bed 2 full nights in a row! Go us.

6. I ate some good food, but not as much as I planned and it wasn't quite as good as I thought it would be.

7. I am so glad to be home.

Hope you all had a great long weekend! I'll write more soon.